I don't know why women are so excited to get married. We, men, become lazy and disgusting pigs once we slap on that wedding band around our fingers. That's when shitting with the door open starts. It's our cue where we can now scratch our balls while standing over the dinner table. And the best married man move of all-time: farting in bed under the blanket. Yes ma'am, the absolutely sexiest move that makes you ladies just wanna wake your man up and reward him with some reverse cowgirl.
No really. There is no more devastating move that ripping an ass load in bed and having the blanket trap it so when your lady lass opens it up, she is greeted with the rotting smell of your anus emission. Consider those days over! The Better Marriage Blanket is your solution. It is a specially designed blanket that absorbs the fart scent so wives can be saved from this divorce inducing move. Check out the Better Marriage Blanket by clicking here. You're very welcome.
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